Second trimester problems
As is said by so many, the second trimester can be such a relief after getting over the first trimester hump. Although as things progress you might find more problems relating to your blossoming bump...
You're so big - are you sure it's just one in there?
At times you can never be sure if remarks like this are well intended or just plain rude. While it might simply be an innocent enough comment, said to acknowledge the visible progress in your baby baking or to convey interest in your wellbeing and pregnancy, sometimes it might just feel like someone is either directly or indirectly telling you that you're getting fat. A woman's appearance is so often subjected to scrutiny, by others as well as (very often) harsh self-criticism, that highlighting what could easily be a sensitive issue is not welcome. In fact, when dealing with a pregnant woman the subject of appearance is even more controversial because she's probably already feeling like she resembles a whale (especially when clothes have passed the point of being described as "snug"), has concerns about how much weight she should be gaining for the health of herself and of her child and is producing more lady hormones in a day than a non-pregnant woman produces in a year. Is it really such a great idea to fan what is probably already a small fire burning constantly? And don't forget that EVERY pregnancy and woman is different and the belly may be bigger or smaller, higher or lower for the same or different gestation.
A cupboard full of clothes that can't be worn
As the belly continues to bulge, your clothes become a bit snug. Then a bit tight. And eventually you accept that your favourite pair of pants is probably not an option anymore. Putting hairbands around the zip and buttons can help, but you might realise that in addition to your expanded waist, your bum might have grown a little too 0_o
It's quite overwhelming if you consider all those cute little dresses, blouses and skirts that just aren't going to fit you anymore and you worry that you might not lose your pregnancy weight and those favourite items may just end up being donated to charity. And those killer heels that make your legs look super long and toned are probably just gathering dust. It almost feels like you're betraying your beloved wardrobe.
It's getting close now, are you excited?
I'm so often tempted to respond with something along the lines of "Yes, but my credit card is not ecstatic". From the moment I found out that I was pregnant, I was overcome by a whirlwind of emotions – immense excitement, joy and a whole load of anxiety! And as things have progressed, the anxiety has lessened as the feeling and frequency of the kicks has strengthened, but there are always worries. After getting past the first trimester with the high rate of miscarriage, things do become more "real", but that also means that this new little life is going to need things and kitting out a nursery is expensive. All in all, pregnancy is an amazingly exciting time, but it is stressful.
Is it a boy or girl?
Curiosity often gets the better of us and when it starts to become obvious that you're either pregnant or have indulged a lot in a short time, the question that was previously "Are you pregnant?" may become "Is it a boy or a girl?". If you do know, it's can be nice to share your baby's gender with those who are interested, but when you want to keep it a secret or a surprise it can feel rather intrusive. I had initially wanted to have a "lucky packet", but my husband wanted to know what our little blessing was and I eventually relented. Now that I do know about our little girl I can tell people, but I find it rather unnerving when people treat you like some sort of freak of nature if you don't want to find out before birth. Or pressurise you to find out because they want to know and it will make things easier for them. Invasion of privacy and overstepping of boundaries much? It's a personal decision and while it is nice to know what to expect, especially if you want to go out and buy pretty pink tutus or some cool superhero onesies, if a parent says that they want to wait then you'll have to wait too!
Birth and breastfeeding decisions
C-section, natural, waterbirth, at home or in hospital, drug free or epidural... While these considerations have probably been on your mind for a while, it's getting to the point when you'll need to make a firm(ish) decision about what you want. But in the era of social media, loaded with personal opinion, fact and utter rubbish, you might find yourself hesitant to talk about what birthing option you choose because you'll be subjected to judgement no matter what you decide to do. And that judgement carries over into whether or not you'll be breast- or formula-feeding after birth. If you opt for an elective C-section (even with legitimate medical concerns) there'll be the "you're not a real mom" brigade telling you that you're too posh to push. An emergency C-section will probably leave them questioning the integrity of your doctor and second guessing what "should have been done". If you want a natural birth, your decision regarding pain management may also leave you on trial by a jury of your friends, family and complete strangers. Then with feeding options you'll have moms that chose to breastfeed and moms that chose to formula feed constantly justifying their decisions to you or pushing their opinions on you. My personal take on all of this is that you need to think about your own expectations, desires and limitations. You need to do what you think is going to be best for you and your child, discuss it with your doctor (and partner) and make a decision. Don't let the general populous make you feel guilty for doing what you think is right because it's your body, your child and your decision. Not every mother can breastfeed, there are many reasons for this – milk not being sufficiently nutritious, poor flow, inverted nipple, psychological aversion. And many mothers choose not to. Again, you need to do what is best for the wellbeing of both you and the baby. Getting stressed out because of other people putting pressure on you to do what they think is right isn't going to help either of you.
You're so big - are you sure it's just one in there?
At times you can never be sure if remarks like this are well intended or just plain rude. While it might simply be an innocent enough comment, said to acknowledge the visible progress in your baby baking or to convey interest in your wellbeing and pregnancy, sometimes it might just feel like someone is either directly or indirectly telling you that you're getting fat. A woman's appearance is so often subjected to scrutiny, by others as well as (very often) harsh self-criticism, that highlighting what could easily be a sensitive issue is not welcome. In fact, when dealing with a pregnant woman the subject of appearance is even more controversial because she's probably already feeling like she resembles a whale (especially when clothes have passed the point of being described as "snug"), has concerns about how much weight she should be gaining for the health of herself and of her child and is producing more lady hormones in a day than a non-pregnant woman produces in a year. Is it really such a great idea to fan what is probably already a small fire burning constantly? And don't forget that EVERY pregnancy and woman is different and the belly may be bigger or smaller, higher or lower for the same or different gestation.
A cupboard full of clothes that can't be worn
As the belly continues to bulge, your clothes become a bit snug. Then a bit tight. And eventually you accept that your favourite pair of pants is probably not an option anymore. Putting hairbands around the zip and buttons can help, but you might realise that in addition to your expanded waist, your bum might have grown a little too 0_o
It's quite overwhelming if you consider all those cute little dresses, blouses and skirts that just aren't going to fit you anymore and you worry that you might not lose your pregnancy weight and those favourite items may just end up being donated to charity. And those killer heels that make your legs look super long and toned are probably just gathering dust. It almost feels like you're betraying your beloved wardrobe.
It's getting close now, are you excited?
I'm so often tempted to respond with something along the lines of "Yes, but my credit card is not ecstatic". From the moment I found out that I was pregnant, I was overcome by a whirlwind of emotions – immense excitement, joy and a whole load of anxiety! And as things have progressed, the anxiety has lessened as the feeling and frequency of the kicks has strengthened, but there are always worries. After getting past the first trimester with the high rate of miscarriage, things do become more "real", but that also means that this new little life is going to need things and kitting out a nursery is expensive. All in all, pregnancy is an amazingly exciting time, but it is stressful.
Is it a boy or girl?
Curiosity often gets the better of us and when it starts to become obvious that you're either pregnant or have indulged a lot in a short time, the question that was previously "Are you pregnant?" may become "Is it a boy or a girl?". If you do know, it's can be nice to share your baby's gender with those who are interested, but when you want to keep it a secret or a surprise it can feel rather intrusive. I had initially wanted to have a "lucky packet", but my husband wanted to know what our little blessing was and I eventually relented. Now that I do know about our little girl I can tell people, but I find it rather unnerving when people treat you like some sort of freak of nature if you don't want to find out before birth. Or pressurise you to find out because they want to know and it will make things easier for them. Invasion of privacy and overstepping of boundaries much? It's a personal decision and while it is nice to know what to expect, especially if you want to go out and buy pretty pink tutus or some cool superhero onesies, if a parent says that they want to wait then you'll have to wait too!
Birth and breastfeeding decisions
C-section, natural, waterbirth, at home or in hospital, drug free or epidural... While these considerations have probably been on your mind for a while, it's getting to the point when you'll need to make a firm(ish) decision about what you want. But in the era of social media, loaded with personal opinion, fact and utter rubbish, you might find yourself hesitant to talk about what birthing option you choose because you'll be subjected to judgement no matter what you decide to do. And that judgement carries over into whether or not you'll be breast- or formula-feeding after birth. If you opt for an elective C-section (even with legitimate medical concerns) there'll be the "you're not a real mom" brigade telling you that you're too posh to push. An emergency C-section will probably leave them questioning the integrity of your doctor and second guessing what "should have been done". If you want a natural birth, your decision regarding pain management may also leave you on trial by a jury of your friends, family and complete strangers. Then with feeding options you'll have moms that chose to breastfeed and moms that chose to formula feed constantly justifying their decisions to you or pushing their opinions on you. My personal take on all of this is that you need to think about your own expectations, desires and limitations. You need to do what you think is going to be best for you and your child, discuss it with your doctor (and partner) and make a decision. Don't let the general populous make you feel guilty for doing what you think is right because it's your body, your child and your decision. Not every mother can breastfeed, there are many reasons for this – milk not being sufficiently nutritious, poor flow, inverted nipple, psychological aversion. And many mothers choose not to. Again, you need to do what is best for the wellbeing of both you and the baby. Getting stressed out because of other people putting pressure on you to do what they think is right isn't going to help either of you.
I don't know why you became a pharmacist and not a journalist
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